Sunday, August 29, 2010

Seasonal YumYums

Just wanted to share really quickly two of my favorite seasonal treats.  First off....
These are little gifts sent down from the official bakery of Heaven located on the corner of Paradise St. and Eternity Blvd.  Seriously, I'm going to take the Crayola route here and say they don't quite taste like pumpkin but more like pumpkin pie. (again FU#$ you crayola and your dastardly choice of adjectives)  All that matters is that they are one of the most delicious things your can buy in your grocery store during our favorite time of the year.  I always start off buying one box at a time (which equates to about 3 boxes a week) and then come the week of Halloween once I know these aren't going to get shipped out to my local grocery store anymore I buy about 20 more boxes to stock up.  Those last 20 boxes last about, oh.... 2 weeks haha.  I think the one improvement that can be made to these cookie treats is the pumpkin faces they "carve" into them.  Seriously, look at them!  They look like they are secretly insulting me in their little pumpkin brains.  But I suppose that's not really a problem since my stomach acid will be "ASSAULTING" them after about 3 seconds.  So I guess the jokes on you little pumpkin smart-asses! (plus they don't really even look like pumpkins, especially without an official "pumpkin" nose, whats up with that.)  This is all trivial though since they are again the greatest seasonal treats one can buy right now.
Another little delicacy I love to feed my throat are these little bad boys.
These might be available year round, I'm not sure, but they just don't taste right unless you are eating them during the Autumn/Halloween season.  Also I would really to ask Tootsie Roll Industries, Inc. what Colombian drug-lord is supplying them with all the crack cocaine they put into these things.  Seriously, if you've ever eaten one tell me that you just stopped after one?  See none of you responded and that's because you can't eat just one.  Wait a minute maybe Tootsie and Lays should team up for this one.
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Remember that old slogan?  Well that's how I feel about these suckers.  I seriously remember beating the shit out of Johnny Whatshisface on the Tyrone Middle School playground for one of these.  He taunted me with it for like half the day and I remember thinking, "Oh you wait until recess you little shitface."  Guess who ended up eating the Caramel Apple Pop?  That's right me, and then I starting shaking and foaming at the mouth and then proceeded to sneak off of the school yard to my local Arbor Drug store (remember those?) to buy another bag. (thank Odin for lunch money)  I honestly bet these could replace cigarettes as the local prison's monetary system if you were to introduce them to the prisoners.  Seriously could you imagine Frank "8-Ball" Colavettii shanking Tommy "The Cobra"  Biondi with a spoon over a fucking Caramel Apple Pop?  I can, because they are that delicious.  Oh and by the way when I said Lays should team up with Tootsie to promote their products together maybe they should bring back this old chap to help.


iZombie said...

mmmmmmm, good stuff...

The Frog Queen said...

Those are the cutest cookies! I might have to find them.


cynniegurl said...

i passed a blogger award to you. you can find it on my site:)